New Years Resolution 2004

It is that time of year again. Resolution time. Time to reflect on all of your bad habits and set your goals for the coming months. My world changed on a resolution, so don't underestimate the power of this time of year. For those of you who don't know I used to be over weight. I have a lot of people come up to me now and say that they don't remember that or they don't believe me. I can assure you it is true. I posted before and after pictures at the end of this blog for you to check out. The funny thing is, I grew up in a small town and I would walk down the street and see people that I have known my whole life and they didn't recognize me when I was at my heaviest. No surprise, I didn't really recognize myself either. I have spent a lot of time wondering how I let my self go to the extent that I did. I think a lot of different factors played in to my decision to gain weight. First of all, I grew up a cheerleader. Working out was fun. Like a lot of high school sports I was driven by passion for the sport instead of trying to look thin. I was blessed in that I never really had to think about my weight. I would eat entire pizzas by myself and never gain a pound. I had a metabolism that I would now kill for. So when I went to college I stopped all physical activity. I gained the inevitable college weight but was still never so heavy that I thought I had a problem but I started to develop some really bad habits. I got a little too comfortable. I was in love, and I am truly convinced that the man I am with would love me no matter what I look like. I think for a lot of couples when you first get married it is easy to fall into la la land and happily gain weight together until it gets a little out of hand and you get more than a little disgusted with yourself. I love food. Always have. Always will. I can't cook, but I can sure eat. Eating a lot, coupled with not working out is not a very good combination. So then, I got pregnant with my first baby. Eighty pounds later. Poof, I was a different human being. I wish I could say the weight that I carried was just because I had a baby. When you carry it for over a year that excuse starts to fade. I am an emotional eater. When I was sad, nervous, happy, or bored I would be eating. It is still a struggle for me to stay disciplined in the food department. It always will be. But thank God I fell in love with exercise. What I have learned in my experience with weight loss is that there is not one set formula that seems to work for everyone. I personally am not a big fan of diets. I feel like it leeds to a roller coaster effect that I have personally put myself through. I hate pills and quick fixes. Like most things in life it is about finding balance. And the battle is always constant. You can't bandage weight loss like you can't bandage most problems. I often get asked the question, what was your secret? I had to stop beating myself up for making poor food choices. In the past when I would eat something I knew was not so good for me I would binge and then convince myself that I would start eating good again on Monday, or the beginning of the month, or New Years. Why not start again the next meal? I never punish myself like I used to about making a poor food choice. I try to make wise choices in the food department most of the time. I try to eat 6 times a day with protein, carb, and veggie combinations. Notice, I used the word try. I am a human being. I do my best. If I had a secret at all it would be to find some type of exercise that you like. I used to hate working out. My mom used to practically force me to come with her, but one day it just clicked with me in a spin class and I just fell in love. Try different things. For me it wasn't just the exercise, I developed a connection to a spin instructor. She will still always hold a special place in my heart, I am not sure I could have stuck with a work out routine if it weren't for her inspiration. A big reason I enjoyed and continue to enjoy going to the gym is because I have developed so many friendships there.
I pray that I will be able to maintain a healthy lifestyle. I continue the journey to find balance in my life. I have swung from extreme to extreme in the past. Temptations are everywhere, but you do the best you can.